My head is reeling. I constantly feel like I’m forgetting something and it seems that 60% of the time I am. Being unorganised bothers me, I mean it really, really bothers me. To the point where I get so flustered all I want to do is stomp my feet and cry a little… I like to think I’m honest enough on my blog to admit that I actually have done that in the last week, I know, how mature.
I’m a control freak. I like things to go my way. I multitask and like my day to work out a particular way. Some days it happens and others it doesn’t. Those are the days that I feel like I’m running on the vapours in my tank. Days like today… actually, like the last 3 weeks.
Aidan has been sick (won’t take him to creche gym when sick), teething and learning to climb and walk for the past month and at the same time my blogging business has started to grow. Balancing out the things I need to do and the things I want to do has been tricky and I’ve definitely dropped the ball a couple of times… but never the baby. I didn’t make his food as often and we didn’t nap as much together but I like to think I gave him my A-game.
Steve on the other hand has been busy with his own work and even though we hug, kiss and talk everyday it feels like I’m living with a roommate. I miss him and he sleeps next to me. I’m just being patient and waiting for our brains to sinc up again. I’m thinking about a staycation this weekend…
My mum is here giving me a hand, bless her fuzzy wuzzy socks. She and Aidan are totally in love and are best mates. I think if Aidan was feeling 100% and didn’t need sympathy snuggles from me I wouldn’t get a look in. She’s also helping me about the house and whilst it’s nice to not have to do it all myself it’s hard not to feel guilty when I see her folding washing and I’m just blogging. I have to force myself to accept the help and not get up and take over.
Something big is happening which I can’t share yet but I will as soon as I’m able. Trust me, I feel like I’m going to burst. I’m also shooting my first concert tomorrow night and I’ve been studying my camera manual and reading online tutorials for days. I usually shoot in natural light so it’s a completely different environment and I have to be prepared. I have a couple of family portraits to shoot as well and a couple of blogs to build. Busy and exciting stuff.
This morning I dragged myself out of bed after yet another night of staying up all hours, to go to the gym of all things. I walked/Xtrained/biked my chunky ass off and afterward all I wanted to do was curl up in a ball and sleep but once I broke through that I felt calmer. I could think a little clearer. I could multitask better. Sure, right now all I want to do is rest my head on the keyboard whilst no one is looking but I think I might have found my answer…
Who knew that for me, it’d be the gym!